By: Felipe Donnelly
It can start off super innocently. Your partner has a great idea for a business that gets you excited. Next thing you know you are writing up a business plan and working on how to finance it. You talk about the plan during breakfast, you have brainstorms during lunch, you throw away half the ideas during dinner, take a sex break and then the final idea of the day is blurted out just before going to sleep. It sounds like a winning combination. For us, luckily it was and still is!
My name is Felipe Donnelly and my business/life partner is Tamy Rofe.Â
We are crazy.Â
It’s easy to define, we did what many rational thinkers warned us against. We went into business with each other. Not one business, not two businesses, but 4 different businesses. Once we discovered we could do one together why not 4? Before I get into how we’ve been successful working together or even why we did this, I’ll bring you into our own personal history.Â
For me it was just another day walking into the office. It was some day in 2004, I don’t quite remember when it was but I clearly remember the feeling. Opening the doors to the Ogivly office in Mexico City and seeing a beautiful new employee sitting at her desk with the nervous smile that only someone can have at the first day of work. I knew that I just had to talk to her. I now need to pull a yada yada yada to the week we got back from our honeymoon about 6 years later. Tamy knew I hated my job in advertising and knew that I was destined to cooking. The idea was super easy. For one full year, let’s invite people to our house, I would create a new menu every week and Tamy would write about it on a blog. The rules were also simple, we could not repeat guests and we could not repeat menus. Tamy was not only a massive personal support in pushing me to do more of what I loved but became very involved in the weekly organization and menu ideation. It was through these fun yet frivolous dinners that I realized it wasn’t only easy to work with Tamy but it was also a blast.Â
I share the short origin story not to give you more insight in our life as a married couple, nor to how we started out businesses. I share this to show that we created the space to try out what working together might feel like. These dinner parties were nothing more than a teaser for what our newly married life was going to be like. It has now been 12 years we have two beautiful children, three restaurants and a catering company together (and two cats) and very honestly (I say this from the bottom of my heart, not because my wife will be reading this) I could not be happier. To be able to share this whole story of life together is something that I feel honored and honestly lucky to be able to do. It may not be for everyone but for us it’s everything
Can I give you some tips for working with your partner? Of course I can thanks for asking.Â
First and most importantly COMMUNICATION. Even when it hurts. Things are never easy, owning a restaurant in excruciating work. Be honest with each other and talk about it always. Communicate and be transparent. Especially with money!
Make time for your relationship. You realize that the majority f your time together will be taken up by work. That is totally normal. But make time for each other. Tamy and I have a weekly date night (sometimes twice a week), this is sacred for us.
Respect each other. During high stress the most important thing is to always respect each other. Don’t say things you will later regret. Unfortunately during big problem moments, it is even easier to get heated with your business/life partner than with anyone else. Watch out what you say or do. Respect goes a long way in life.